Sunday, March 30, 2014

How To Stop Feeling Angry After She Cheated On You

By Jeraldine Hemongala


After finding out your wife cheated on you, several things can brew such as revenge, depression and anger. The latter is a very powerful thing and is very destructive. Compared to depression and thoughts of revenge, it is much harder to remove anger from a person.

There are constructive ways to deal with the anger you feel after being cheated on. Keep in mind that anger is often really "hurt" in disguise. The two emotions are very similar and often anger is a way to mask the hurt you harbor inside. So address the pain and you will also be addressing the anger.

Here are some suggestions on how to handle your anger after being cheated on.

1. Talking to someone about your feelings is one of the best ways, either with a trained professional, or with a close and discreet friend or family member.

Men are notorious for being bad communicators. They have a tendency to keep things bottled up inside. If that is true of you, it's vital that you allow yourself to open up and let the anger out. It does the most damage when it is kept pent up inside.

2. Another way to get the anger out is to write your feelings down. Again, this comes easier for some than others. The point is to get those feelings on the outside; to work out what you are thinking and feeling so you can move on to deciding what you want. Can you forgive and forget? Is the relationship worth salvaging? Is your wife willing to try again? Are you?

Exercise can also help you feel and look good about yourself. It will help boost your confidence and self-worth that was crushed after knowing about your wife's infidelity. Exercise everyday and often.

4. An act of infidelity is bound to do a number on your feelings of self worth, but it does NOT have to be the end. If the marital relationship matters to you - and to her - together you can move beyond the crisis and have a full and happy life together. However, it takes communication and a mutual commitment in order to do this.

Take the lesson and forget what happened. It is easier said than done, but in time things will get easier. Take measures to forget it one day at a time. Distract yourself by being busy and just move on with your life.

Consider the circumstances. Was she feeling neglected, taken for granted? Was she working in a job that required lots of travel and lonely nights in a hotel room? What could or should be changed to continue with the relationship?

Whether with or without her, you now have a chance at a fresh start. Use the lessons you've learned from the past to build a meaningful and happy future.




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