Wednesday, February 10, 2016

The Dangers Of The Word Should

By Evan Sanders


The word "should" is an incredibly dangerous word.

There's a lot of serious emotions attached to that word. There's a lot of major suffering that comes along with that word. Pain. Grief. Expectation. The works.

That word can do a significant amount of damage to your life and keep you utterly stuck in the past.

Maybe you've said this before...

"That shouldn't have happened...this should have happened...it should have gone this way."

Truth is, it didn't go that way.

When you are living in the land of should you are living in the past or the future.

When the "should" you have exists in the past, you aren't able to come to terms with what happened because you want it to go a different way entirely. You can't accept the facts and you keep on thinking that it should have gone a completely different way. You see how dangerous this is?

So what's the skill to learn here? Come back to the present moment over and over again.

There's danger in having your "should" exist in the future as well. When your should is in the future, you are projecting specific events that have to happen onto a time and place you really have no idea what will happen in the first place. Then, when your projection doesn't happen you end up being incredibly disappointed.

You have to come back.

We are all going to have incredibly painful times in our lives that are going to make us want to project an experience onto a life we really have real idea of what's going to happen. That's ok in some ways, but the reality is you have to come back to living in the mystery of the present moment.

The dark times will always be present.

But what makes us suffer endlessly is not accepting the truth.

So...you have to view it this way. What happened happened...and it couldn't have happened in any other way.

What happens when you let go of your past and your future?

What will happen...will happen...and it will be the most perfect thing for me.

"Should" doesn't exist anymore.

No past.

No future...because you're in the moment.

You're living "here."

So stay in touch with the present moment and exist in the present.

Accept.




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