Monday, January 23, 2012

The Importance of Letting Go

By Lilly Carter


As we go through life, there are times when we are in a relationship and will fall out with the person whom we love. In those times, the importance of letting go of those we love cannot be overstated. This is particularly true if the split is irreconcilable. How we handle a break up is very important to how our own lives are affected.

It is often the case that the least advisable action to take is to try and fix things. Your former partner may not wish to reciprocate and will be rendered more antagonistic to you as a result of your efforts. You will come off as overbearing and will be spending time in a profitless manner. Simply put, just back off.

A particular reason as to why people have such difficulty accepting their relationship has ended is due to their memory playing tricks on them. They idealize the happy times in that relationship and gloss over the less happy periods. In this way, they view their relationship through rose tinted spectacles.

This rose-tinted view is belied, however, by the simple fact that the relationship has ended. Furthermore, it is unlikely that everything was wonderful leading up to the finish, either. There may be one cause for the failure of a relationship, or several, but there is always a cause. And it is unlikely to be a trivial one, either, as it was significant enough to end the relationship.

Even if you do not know what the reason was, the reason is definitely there. Whether it is something you did, something they did, or whether it was both of those factors and a host of others may well be a question that you can never find an answer to. And you are well advised to not expend a huge amount of your time trying to do so, as such obsessiveness can be self-destructive.

Accept the fact that there are some things in life that you are not able to control. Other people will make decisions of their own accord, and you are not able to influence everything. If your partner has elected to end the relationship, you cannot prevent them from doing so. You must simply acquiesce to the fact that the relationship is over and get on with your life.

Accepting that fact and moving on with your life is far from easy, though. That will take considerable time, and there is plenty of raw emotion that you will need to deal with. Sadly, you will find that, no matter how far you get on, you will never completely get over what happened with your failed relationship.

In spite of that, letting go of your failed relationship and moving on is of immense importance. It is important for both your health and for your own happiness. Time wasted clinging to the past in the hope of reviving something that is finished for good is time that could be better spent improving your own life, meeting someone else, and forging a mutually beneficial relationship that can bring you real fulfillment.




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