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None of us desires to suffer agony caused by another person. A break up of a friendship, a passionate relationship or especially a marriage can be particularly painful and leave an enduring effect on our lives. There can be emotional scars and even real physical agony. Sometimes such painful experiences may result in what is labeled physiologically as "fear of intimacy", which takes the nervousness of hurt to a different level.
Fear of Intimacy
The fear of intimacy is the fear of being hurt emotionally by permitting yourself to be exposed in a relationship. Occasionally the fear of intimacy is experienced emotionally as well as physically. The individual with fear of intimacy is usually scared of emotional closeness. This fear can manifest itself in numerous ways such as fearing rejection, desertion, betrayal or vulnerability. It may also be felt as a dread of becoming engulfed or entrapped by another.
How Does It Develop?
How does fear of intimacy develop? Some believe it may be the result of agony from prior relations. Having a partner who is violent or unfaithful definitely causes deep heartache and can end up in even deeper physiological scars. The fear of intimacy is a self-protection mechanism to guard against being hurt and crushed emotionally once-again.
Many are convinced fear of intimacy develops during childhood as a protective behavior. Somebody may have had a parent who did not express love, was aggressive, or deserted the family leaving the kid feeling rejected and unloved. When something bad happens to us we have a tendency to prepare our lives to guard against facing similar malicious experiences. Of course, this self-protection thru shutting others out, only leads to more heartache in the form of isolation. The alternative is to be open to like, intimacy, and vulnerability. Yet, each fiber of your mind and body could be hollering, "No! I was hurt before by being this open. Can I be assured that if I adore intimately I won't be hurt again?"
The Other Partner
Fear of intimacy is typically looked at thru the eyes of the one who has the emotional hurdle but it can also be devastating to the other partner. Imagine living alongside a spouse who fears being intimate and sabotages your each effort made to have an ordinary relationship due to be afraid of. You are the one who is continually confounded and made to appear like the one with the emotional problem. The person attempting to protect themselves will most likely use anything at their disposal to guard their own weakness even to the point of being devious. They may frequently place the blame on you, to protect themselves.
Living like this may be lonely and mystifying. In a number of cases the fear of intimacy may manifest itself emotionally, though not physically. The relationship might have an active sex life but something is seriously missing. The fear of emotional intimacy destroys a good relationship. Yes there's physical delight, nevertheless it falls far short of satisfying your emotional needs. Your partner could be free to have physical intimacy but they may be fiercely defending their heart at every step.
Emotional Intimacy
Intimacy should create a place of trust, where we are accepted, loved, and respected. A healthy relationship should provide a place where you can feel the freedom to share your inner thoughts, flaws, and lacks and know that you're going to still be accepted. In a good relationship, neither side is degraded and nobody will leave the other or make them feel deserted. It should be such a lovely place, a calm place, a place to grow with each other and to learn the wonderments of this world. It also should be a place where each partner is growing closer to God. Yet, it isn't.
Is There An Answer?
I encourage you to click on the gift, "God's Answer?" an instantly downloadable 29 page PDF file which will exhibit how to live life thru a power that will radically transform your life. You will find out how to live a life of intimacy you have not imagined.
How many years have you struggled with a fear of intimacy or journeyed with a spouse who fears intimacy? You are not here accidentally. It's time to give your fears to Him and let Him point you to the life of intimacy you have dreamed. I inspire you to allow your heart to receive "God's Answer?" You see, it is way more about your heart and your intimacy with Him.
"God's Answer?"
How to Live Through A Power Which Will Transform Your Life!
Fear of Intimacy
The fear of intimacy is the fear of being hurt emotionally by permitting yourself to be exposed in a relationship. Occasionally the fear of intimacy is experienced emotionally as well as physically. The individual with fear of intimacy is usually scared of emotional closeness. This fear can manifest itself in numerous ways such as fearing rejection, desertion, betrayal or vulnerability. It may also be felt as a dread of becoming engulfed or entrapped by another.
How Does It Develop?
How does fear of intimacy develop? Some believe it may be the result of agony from prior relations. Having a partner who is violent or unfaithful definitely causes deep heartache and can end up in even deeper physiological scars. The fear of intimacy is a self-protection mechanism to guard against being hurt and crushed emotionally once-again.
Many are convinced fear of intimacy develops during childhood as a protective behavior. Somebody may have had a parent who did not express love, was aggressive, or deserted the family leaving the kid feeling rejected and unloved. When something bad happens to us we have a tendency to prepare our lives to guard against facing similar malicious experiences. Of course, this self-protection thru shutting others out, only leads to more heartache in the form of isolation. The alternative is to be open to like, intimacy, and vulnerability. Yet, each fiber of your mind and body could be hollering, "No! I was hurt before by being this open. Can I be assured that if I adore intimately I won't be hurt again?"
The Other Partner
Fear of intimacy is typically looked at thru the eyes of the one who has the emotional hurdle but it can also be devastating to the other partner. Imagine living alongside a spouse who fears being intimate and sabotages your each effort made to have an ordinary relationship due to be afraid of. You are the one who is continually confounded and made to appear like the one with the emotional problem. The person attempting to protect themselves will most likely use anything at their disposal to guard their own weakness even to the point of being devious. They may frequently place the blame on you, to protect themselves.
Living like this may be lonely and mystifying. In a number of cases the fear of intimacy may manifest itself emotionally, though not physically. The relationship might have an active sex life but something is seriously missing. The fear of emotional intimacy destroys a good relationship. Yes there's physical delight, nevertheless it falls far short of satisfying your emotional needs. Your partner could be free to have physical intimacy but they may be fiercely defending their heart at every step.
Emotional Intimacy
Intimacy should create a place of trust, where we are accepted, loved, and respected. A healthy relationship should provide a place where you can feel the freedom to share your inner thoughts, flaws, and lacks and know that you're going to still be accepted. In a good relationship, neither side is degraded and nobody will leave the other or make them feel deserted. It should be such a lovely place, a calm place, a place to grow with each other and to learn the wonderments of this world. It also should be a place where each partner is growing closer to God. Yet, it isn't.
Is There An Answer?
I encourage you to click on the gift, "God's Answer?" an instantly downloadable 29 page PDF file which will exhibit how to live life thru a power that will radically transform your life. You will find out how to live a life of intimacy you have not imagined.
How many years have you struggled with a fear of intimacy or journeyed with a spouse who fears intimacy? You are not here accidentally. It's time to give your fears to Him and let Him point you to the life of intimacy you have dreamed. I inspire you to allow your heart to receive "God's Answer?" You see, it is way more about your heart and your intimacy with Him.
"God's Answer?"
How to Live Through A Power Which Will Transform Your Life!
About the Author:
Burton Rager author of "Living Life Set Free" and "God's Answer?" Receive your complimentary copy of "God's Answer?"To watch a video to discover more about: Fear of Intimacy
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