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How often have you heard the statement "I'll never be in a position to pardon myself for what I've done?" Perhaps you're even guilty of making that statement yourself. Forgiveness can be a extraordinarily tough thing to supply another who has discredited or hurt us, but forgiving ourselves appears to be harder still. There looks to be a tendency to hold ourselves a great deal more responsible for than we hold others for the exact same offense.
Why is that? 1 reason is pride. While that may appear to be a contradiction, it's really not. Whenever we enforce a different set of rules, or enact a higher set of standards for ourselves over others, that's pride. When we can find it inside our self to forgive others, though not ourselves, what we are in effect pronouncing is that we are less capable of making a poor decision than others. We are saying that we believe our self to be more discerning, sensible, more judicious and more careful than others, and we have no excuse for doing what we probably did and should not pardon ourselves. When God Himself, offers to excuse the sins of all who seek His forgiveness but we refuse to forgive ourselves, we are setting ourselves above others and that, is pride.
So how does one forgive one's self? Simple, exactly they would forgive somebody else. The principles are the same.
First, one must find the forgiveness of God for all sin finally is against Him. King David reminded us of that when he sought forgiveness for sleeping with a married woman. He then compounded his wrong when he had her hubby removed from the picture by ordering him to the front lines of battle where he knew he'd be killed. In Psalm 51:3&4, he cries out to God and says, "For I know my transgressions, and my sin is ever before me. Against you and you only I have sinned and done what is evil in your sight."
God is ready and waiting to excuse your sin and then, He guarantees to remember it no more.
I John 1:9 "If we confess our sin, He is dependable and just to pardon us our sin and to clean us from all unrighteousness."
The next step is to recollect that forgiveness is a choice, not a feeling. In the same way you must opt to pardon someone, (not just try and feel better about them or what they actually did) you must choose to forgive yourself.
Next, it is vital to recollect that forgiveness does not necessarily mean excusing the action "for another person, or yourself. That's what so dynamic about forgiveness. It's choosing to forgive despite the incorrect or ghastly thing done to or by you. It also suggests not dwelling on it any more or bringing it up again in any farther conversation, either with others, or yourself.
When true forgiveness takes place, it involves taking pity on that person and recognizing that they need grace as much as you do. Forgiving yourself means taking pity on yourself, as much as you would any other person. With that, goes recognizing and recognizing your desire for grace. Don't be hard on yourself. You're a human being with weakness and issues and a great capacity for messing up. Take responsibility for the injustices you have done, receive God's forgiveness and then extend that hand of mercy to yourself.
If, God in all His greatness and power freely extends forgiveness to you when you ask, who are you not to discover how to forgive yourself?
Why is that? 1 reason is pride. While that may appear to be a contradiction, it's really not. Whenever we enforce a different set of rules, or enact a higher set of standards for ourselves over others, that's pride. When we can find it inside our self to forgive others, though not ourselves, what we are in effect pronouncing is that we are less capable of making a poor decision than others. We are saying that we believe our self to be more discerning, sensible, more judicious and more careful than others, and we have no excuse for doing what we probably did and should not pardon ourselves. When God Himself, offers to excuse the sins of all who seek His forgiveness but we refuse to forgive ourselves, we are setting ourselves above others and that, is pride.
So how does one forgive one's self? Simple, exactly they would forgive somebody else. The principles are the same.
First, one must find the forgiveness of God for all sin finally is against Him. King David reminded us of that when he sought forgiveness for sleeping with a married woman. He then compounded his wrong when he had her hubby removed from the picture by ordering him to the front lines of battle where he knew he'd be killed. In Psalm 51:3&4, he cries out to God and says, "For I know my transgressions, and my sin is ever before me. Against you and you only I have sinned and done what is evil in your sight."
God is ready and waiting to excuse your sin and then, He guarantees to remember it no more.
I John 1:9 "If we confess our sin, He is dependable and just to pardon us our sin and to clean us from all unrighteousness."
The next step is to recollect that forgiveness is a choice, not a feeling. In the same way you must opt to pardon someone, (not just try and feel better about them or what they actually did) you must choose to forgive yourself.
Next, it is vital to recollect that forgiveness does not necessarily mean excusing the action "for another person, or yourself. That's what so dynamic about forgiveness. It's choosing to forgive despite the incorrect or ghastly thing done to or by you. It also suggests not dwelling on it any more or bringing it up again in any farther conversation, either with others, or yourself.
When true forgiveness takes place, it involves taking pity on that person and recognizing that they need grace as much as you do. Forgiving yourself means taking pity on yourself, as much as you would any other person. With that, goes recognizing and recognizing your desire for grace. Don't be hard on yourself. You're a human being with weakness and issues and a great capacity for messing up. Take responsibility for the injustices you have done, receive God's forgiveness and then extend that hand of mercy to yourself.
If, God in all His greatness and power freely extends forgiveness to you when you ask, who are you not to discover how to forgive yourself?
About the Author:
Burton Rager author of "Living Life Set Free" and "God's Answer?" Click to learn more about Forgiving Yourself and receive a complimentary copy of "God's Answer?" To warch a video go to How To Forgive Yourself
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